I spotted three big holes in your setup that are keeping you from running 12's, IMHO:
1) Antioch, CALIFORNIA! /ubbthreads/images//graemlins/crazy.gif So, for starters you have the crappiest gas in the US.
2) "Built 9:1 compression motor". This does not go well with #1 above! /ubbthreads/images//graemlins/banghead.gif With 91 octane you want to keep the stock 7.8:1 compression if at all possible, unless you plan on running additives or racegas.
3) "small TD05H-16G turbo". I used to have a small 16g. Back in the 90's, people said it was "all the turbo you will need". /ubbthreads/images//graemlins/rolleyes.gif But, even the best, ported 16g is very limited in boost capability, especially when you couple it with an engine that is already prone to knock issues and is running on such poor quality gasoline. The DSMLink doesn't help, because it has stock 1G maps which top out at 15psi, which are way too aggressive for your setup.
The EVO3 16G is quite a bit better, with good efficiency up to ~24-25psi, but I still wouldn't put it on your combination. You are right, in YOUR case you should buy a big honkin' turbo, one that's not going to be super-heating the air at 25 psi.
But, with 91 octane its a point of diminishing returns. You should really consider a meth injection setup or some other way to increase the octane, so you can safely raise the boost to the 24-25psi range.